Thoughts on Wine

On Friday night Virginia and I went to a unique sort of wine tasting. Some friends of ours bought a $100 bottle of wine, and each couple was to bring a $10 bottle of wine. We then had a blind taste test, were instructed to write down our thoughts, and attempt to pick out the $100 bottle. These are my thoughts (point of information; the wine master was named Paul):

1. Trying to figure out the psychology of Paul. Would he be so brash as to put the expensive wine first? That's a definitive power move, but I think he's holding back. No.

2. Now feeling that a wine class of sorts would be useful. A usable, functional course unlike International Business or Early Russian Literature. Something that would help me now, unlike my palate. Not this one.

3. Something's different here. I can't quite put my finger on it. Maybe the legs? The bouquet? Regardless, it's not here.

4. It's starting to creep in on the side of the eyeballs like a marching army of $10 price tags. They've radioed for reinforcements and I'm afraid for myself. The crowd has crescendoed and fallen and danger lurks ahead. Like the bar in Chapel Hill; He's Not Here.

5. I need a monocle and top hat. I need to rub elbows on the red carpet. Colbert Platinum is on in the background as I make high powered deals in the back of the Maybach. I'm doing these things because I just finished a $100 glass of wine.

6. Feeling more confident with my decision now, I anxiously await four to six more evidence of my correctness. Grammar failing a bit but confidence is still high. Possibly artificially high.

7. Short phrases to match my time with the wine. Juan Valdez. Dry roasted. Paul's a drinking slave driver.

8. A wine timeout. A break from the cracking whip. Bubbles when I swirled. It took me back to child-times. I want to make snow angels and paper airplanes. I want to be a fireman or an astronaut. Bring number nine.

9. Pungent. It smells like gasoline but in a good way. I'm looking forward to the end because I can faintly see the light down there. The cave feels less obtrusive and frightful now. The creatures are thinning and the torch will surely hold the spark.

10. I've lost interest because I think I've won. It's the scary time where the relationship can turn south because you're both too comfortable. The wine slips on like a microfiber blanket. I may be too warm.