Motivation and Disappointment, Poker

I've been fairly proud of myself lately. I've been coming home from work and actually accomplishing things despite being drained. It's not that my job is physically tiring or mentally taxing, but it does it's best to suck the life out of me. Today, for instance. I took a phone call from an old lady who couldn't hear and wouldn't listen. I had to yell everything into the phone five or six times before she would get it. Everybody else thought it was funny as hell, I was hoping that her cat would die or she would break the urn that held her husband's ashes. Not because I dislike her, I didn't even know her, but because I deal with twenty different versions of her all day, every day, and each is equally as irritating. Anyway, despite dealing with this frustration from sunrise to moonrise I've been coming home and getting things done. I polished off another chapter in my real estate book last night, I've taken care of a few errands that I've been putting off, I'm even starting to make headway on my messy room and pile of laundry. All of these uppers and I was still really bummed when I talked to Virginia. She told me that she was going to go on vacation with her dad the first week of June rather than move here. I'm still not sure of the time table, but all I can focus on is that I've waited so long and been so patient, and now I have to wait some more. I can't seem to remember that she'll be here permanently when this is all done, I can only see that we will get one less week together before she starts the five years of hell that is residency. I'm also mad at myself for not having a better job that I can't just go with her and her dad. That thought opens the floodgates for a multitude of other thoughts as well. Hopefully this is a temporary feeling that will be gone in the morning because I realize that there are a million reasons why I shouldn't be bothered by any of this, but it did bother me and now I have to deal with it.

I suppose the above situation isn't helped by the fact that I'm getting throttled at poker tonight. It's one of those nights that happens, and I'm taking it pretty well, but it's sort of like a prostate exam; you only take it because you have to. I've dropped AK to QQ on an A-high flop when runner flush cards hit; I dropped KK to 33; I got set up with TT vs KK on an all under flop (but I got away from it without going broke), and I've been on the wrong end of a couple of running straight cards as well. I'm only down $10, which is 2 buy-ins, but I hate losing at these limits because I know I shouldn't. Like I said though, these nights happen and you just have to take them like a prostate exam; hold your breath and think of something cool, like a Ferrari.